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Boulder County Roller Derby

Live Bold, Bleed Gold

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Purple People Eaters

Abena Aka Norm headshot
#91

Abena Aka Norm

Abena started derby in Richmond, VA then moved to CO in 2013. She’s been a pivot and blocker but is trying to become successful in her most hated position: jammer. Abena loves hippos and strives to incorporate their style into her skating.

Derby DOB: 2010
Positions: Blocker, Pivot, Jammer
I like: Plow stops, hippos & cheese
I don’t like: Pickles & bad sportsmanship
Barking Spider headshot
#00

Barking Spider

I grew up on the East Coast – where the snow does not melt and the snow stays in a gray dirty piles for months until it is finally warm. I moved to Colorado in 2009 and reinvented myself in different ways. One way I chose to reinvent myself was to try roller derby. Problem was I hadn’t skated since I was a pre-teen. I bought myself $100 skates and proceeded to skate around a park.

Unfortunately, since I forgot how to stop I just threw myself into the grass. After a month of this interesting method of stopping, I found out that roller derby teams will train a person how to be safe on the track and play the game.

Now, several years later, I am still skating in circles on the track and enjoying the comradery from skating with friends. I still skate outside every so often and I can safely stop without throwing myself into the grass.

Derby DOB: December 2011
Position: Blocker
I like: When coffee kicks in at the right time; Fart Jokes – my skater name is a fart joke; Anything with sugar.
I don’t like: Squishy food waste in the sink; When a stray hair gets in your sock and ends up between two toes.
Bettie Rage headshot
#118

Bettie Rage

Immediately invested in the well-being of the league, I’ve spent the last three years as president. Now I finally get the chance to play for me and get really good until my body just says no.

Derby DOB: 12/2018
Position: Blocker
I like: Crafting, wine and friends.
I don’t like: Snotty noses
Bully Jean headshot
#612

Bully Jean

Dedicated introvert. Subtly charming zombie advocate. Passionate troublemaker. She’s the one who thinks what you said was dirty.

Derby DOB: 2010
Positions: Blocker, Pivot
I like: schadenfreude, jólakötturinn, your dog
I don’t like: government cover-ups, putting the pillows into the pillow cases, wet dish sponge smell
Count Smackula headshot
#1872

Count Smackula

I’ve watched derby from the sidelines for years. Now finally in it and finding my community among a bunch of other overthinkers with pent up aggression.

So far, I fall a lot and I’m pretty good at getting back up quickly.

Derby DOB: 2023
Position: Blocker
I like: Spooky things. Gay things. Bats.
I don’t like: Describing myself in little boxes. Mosquitoes & ticks (those bloodsuckers can go right back to the hell they came from)
Gouda Cris headshot
#32

Gouda Cris

Born in the mountains and loved to walk in the wilderness from a young age. One day she moved to the city. And though she misses the wilderness one day she found a large grocery store selling expensive cheese.

After taking home some delicious and stinky cheeses she knew she loved cheese from the moment the moldy milk touched her tongue. Today, she can’t go a day without her daily cheese intake. Also, loves skating.

Derby DOB: 2019
Position: Blocker
I like: Queso Fresco, Cheddar, Bad Bunny, Beyoncé
I don’t like: *butterflies* 🙁 and peas
Razzberry Jamz headshot
#415

Razzberry Jamz

Started in the juniors, now we here.

Derby is my home away from home. Love these peeps <3

Derby DOB: 2017
Positions: Blocker, Jammer
I like: Art, Scary Movies, and Cats
I don’t like: Cold Weather, Deep Water, and Bees
Scarebear headshot
#864

Scarebear

I grew up playing softball but was ready to trade in my cleats for skates around 16. Unfortunately, my dad brought up some good points, as I had already put so much into softball and earned a scholarship to play in college that I needed to see through before picking up a new sport. I finally got around to signing up to get to know more about my local roller derby league in South Carolina back in 2020, just weeks before the world shut down, so my journey towards roller derby was halted yet again. I was offered a job in Massachusetts shortly after and was unable to fit anything new into my work schedule- so that pushed my skate shopping by another year and a half. I finally had enough & decided to make a change: in my career, in the scenery & in the way I spent my time. Fast forward to 2023 and a big move to Colorado, I finally got back around to going for it and have loved every moment of being apart of this league & this sport. I have never felt more empowered by a group, than I have with BCRD & I couldn’t be more grateful to skate around with these incredible humans!

Derby DOB: 2022
Position: Blocker
I like: Dogs, spooky season & playing with mud (some call it clay)
I don’t like: When only one AirPod dies, snakes & changing a tire
Shred Astaire headshot
#7300

Shred Astaire

Dancer turned jammer; when I attended my first practice in 2021, it was love at first sight. I’ve been rolling with this awesome league ever since, and couldn’t be more happy.

Derby DOB: 2021
Position: Jammer
I like: Pine tree smell, flowers, cheese of all kinds
I don’t like: Mayo, impractical shoes, hangnails
Swiss Madame headshot
#589

Swiss Madame

Known for her love of all things roller skating, cheese, skiing, and adventure, this fierce competitor brings a contagious spirit of joy and laughter to the rink. Her signature move? The “giggle and hug” – a quick break from the hard-hitting action to share some love with her teammates. And don’t be fooled by her sweet demeanor – fueled by caffeine and a competitive drive, she’s a force to be reckoned with.

Derby DOB: 2022
Position: Blocker
I like: Cheese, hugs, sunshowers
I don’t like: Sardines, spiders, wind

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Boulder County Roller Derby· Boulder, CO

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Boulder County Roller Derby
  • Bouts
  • Skate
    • Join BCRD
    • Drop In
  • Teams
    • Boulder Creek Kraken
    • High Peak Howlers
    • Purple People Eaters
    • St. Vrain Swamp Monsters
    • Boulder County Devils (juniors)
    • Officials
  • Support Us
    • Our Sponsors
    • Sponsor BCRD
    • Donate
  • About
  • FAQs
  • Contact